finally over it.

i had this long-term relationship. three years. it finally had to end when i moved away and there was just no way to make it work long distance. it has been over a year and i have been slowly but surely working on getting over it. yesterday, i think i really hit a milestone. i could finally say
"i don't need you anymore."

this relationship wasn't with a person. it was with a place - a place called sundance.

i worked in the deli at the sundance resort for three years. i also worked as an ambassador for the events and i helped in the general store from time to time. i got addictions to fine jewelry, celebrity-sightings and gourmet food.

i got used to eating amazing pastries every day. and bacon. and fresh fruit. and smoothies. and ice cream. things that i never really ate growing up - artichoke hearts, feta cheese, kalamata olives, hummus, avocados, horseradish, pastrami - these were at my disposal whenever i wanted them. i had freedom to create new menu dishes using whatever ingredients were available (and most things were available). i even learned to like foods that i had despised, like cucumbers and green peppers.

when i moved to georgia i found myself buying groceries and eating at home. it took a long time to get used to my new life. i couldn't just go grab a bowl of soup or fill up my soda cup or eat a cookie unless i bought it and made it myself. over time i found myself making little strides toward a life without sundance.

i have successfully made apple turnovers, corn chowder, chipotle sauce, dutch apple pie, cinnamon rolls, chicken salad and many other tasty things. things that i thought i wouldn't see the likes of after leaving sundance.

then, last week, i made this salad:

the next day, i had a wrap with lettuce, pepperoni, olives, mozzerella, artichoke hearts and light caeser dressing. for dinner, chicken quesadillas with homemade guacamole and salsa.

finally, yesterday, i did it.
i made a blueberry rhubarb bar.

a friend from church had this recipe on her blog for rhubarb bars and i modified it. next time, i'm adding chopped walnuts to the oat mix and i will have it perfected.

i ate one for breakfast this morning and i thought,

"i don't need you anymore. i can do it myself."

now if i can only get the mountains in my backyard

(but never have to drive in bad weather conditions),
i'll be set.